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I took some classes when I first moved to Belgium and met some really cool people there. And there I found people I really clicked with and through them, I've met more people. I also am an avid runner so if you run, let me know and we could go running! Starting Dutch classes soon so hoping this will help bring some much needed company. Will definitely pm you. If you feel like it might be your thing, always feel free to share in the daily slowchat usually stickied thread.
Do you like partying? I'm not really a serious option or anything, but i habe some friends i go to parties with sometimes, group activities, or just gettin 'd on the cough. I swear that word is the bane of my existence. Anyway, I'm down to hangout, and if you want I'll throw you an invite when me and mine go out :. Oh, and as for ideas, facebook has a few expat grpups, they have nights out, dancin activities, and so on. Same for meetup.
I'd also suggest you hit on some guys :. I'm gonna go habe some coffee, and you look interesting. Would you like to have coffee with me? Straight to the point. You can be less dirct or more nuanced, but if you can put your ego aside Thank you for the pep talk!
Loneliness is an ugly beast and it is hard to maneuver social circles in a new country especially after So, sure, hit me up when the opportunity arises.
As for approaching men, I definitely have no problem doing that, my ego is quite docile. Will give this a try. When you approach people, remember that just as people have an "approach anxiety" - people also have an "approachED anxiety" - like, most people are in a trance, going about their day, then some stranger pops up, and like what? Now they need to respond somehow SO, when approachign strangers Give them some breathing time to realize what is happening That's why things like "preframes" are useful and what not, and also a history-story, like "Hi, I know this is a bit random, but I was just standing here, and I saw you and I thought to myself, it would sure be interesting to have some coffee with this person" - see, when you are stretching it, the person has time to wake up from their haze, and be like "oh Props to you if you can fuck with their heads with some negative emotional spiking, example "Hey I know this is random, and I feel like I really shouldnt' be saying this I mean, I dont' wanna sound rude And, don't take this personally" - all those are makign the person think "omfg, is there something between my teeth?
I actually would like to have coffee with you" or whatever So - this is something that usually doesn't happen to people too often from strangers They deeply want magical strange encounters! So - remember, you're giving people value! Hahhahahaha that was quite fun to read.
You should definitely give dating advice, maybe even wingman professionally. You sound pretty cool. Your vibrant mood is contagious. Thank you for writing.
Will be waiting for that invite. I am a pretty easy going person. Music jazz, blues, hip hop, house, electro, afrobeat I am Lebanese. English and Arabic are native level. French is progressing. And just signed up for learning Dutch from scratch. You do yoga in the park alone, while there are dozens of yoga clubs in Brussels or just "pay random amount" gatherings? You're setting yourself up for failure. Same thing. Approach people. Music: find bars that play live music, go for a drink, get to know the people working there, don't be creepy but friendly.
Smoke a cigarette with them or share a drink at the end of the evening. Food: find hipster food bars, frequent them, ask for suggestions. There's a place called Loa in Antwerp, a very small street food establishment with only 2 tables, so people are forced to sit next to each other. Even seen strangers sharing food? I did, touched my soul. Travel: when I travel I just randomly approach people who are doing what I'm doing. If we hit it off, we do shit together. Cooking: you can help out in a local vzw, some that do music events or whatever.
Antwerp is filled with those and they organize cookouts for the homeless, for the staff, whatever.
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Usually they're also all mixed arabs, africans. Dancing: Antwerp has weekly salsa lessons, open to everyone, I think for free, then it's random dancing. Look for it in Brussels. Socializing is very easy, but in Belgium it's horrible. I'm so glad I've left that place. But really, it's all about making a habit out of socializing and invading. You have weekly get togethers in bars or pubs, like a language exchange thing.
You can still get to know fun people. From now on, anything you do, make a habit of approaching people. But please, be groomed, nice, not creepy. People don't like creepy people. Don't invite men home, that's a "fuck me" date. My story: lived in multiple countries, super social everywhere, have to escape from social contant because it's getting too much and need to plan my fuck marathons so that girls don't run into each other when leaving my place.
First couple of days will be Tindering to meet girls, I will date them but not fuck them. Will use them as social validation to hit up places, clubs, bars etc. Once I have established a fake friends base and know the nice places, I can actually start dating and pulling people there. By that time I already know the people that work there by name or just visual confirmation. I start befriending and chatting to people that seem like frequent visitors.
Social proof in the pocket. Every time I arrive to certain places, it's loaded with acquaintances now.
I also only go to places which are logistically nice and make it easy to meet people. Don't choose places where you have to sit inside and can't approach or be approached. Just last week I've met a dude who came out for a cig, looked at him, made eye contact and said: where you from? Couple of days later I'm sitting at his place with a girl and his partner discussing business, exchanging contacts and discussing potential future.
Also, don't be afraid to take some initiative yourself to seek out and approach interesting people.
If you were interesting men would be looking forward to a second or more night stands.. If you fancy making a trip down to Antwerp once a month, I host a women's book club. Hey there, sounds right up my alley since I am literature student. Would love to be part of this. Most other PhD students are between 22 and 27 so I also feel the age gap. So for an old fart like you, I can definitely understand. Still, my PhD students colleagues are not completely immature kids same goes for yours I guess.